Many people often complain about one common issue they had when using online hookup and dating sites. The conversation and flirt they had online is hot and entertaining, but when they meetup in real life, things and feelings are totally different. Many people think it's usually because of the difference of appearance, that many people would put on the best photo of themselves on those hookup and dating apps when they really meet each other, they are not exactly the same as they are on photos. As a matter of fact, this is only a relatively minor factor. The major cause is self-cultivation. When you chat online, you'll have plenty of time to think about what you are going to say, so as to portray yourself to be a person you want to be. But when you meetup in real life, all words and moves are extemporaneous. You are exposed. So today, let's talk a little bit about self-cultivation.
In real life, what exactly does self-cultivation refer to? You must speak appropriately and try to be consistent. Second, respecting each other, admiring each other, being considerate of each other, and letting the other person have a sense of presence and belonging. This feeling is very important, which is tantamount to being firmly chosen by others.
Respond promptly, quickly and accurately. Once the other party make any invites or requests, you must respond seriously. Don't be perfunctory. Even if you talk about something face-to-face, you must try to be attentive and focused. After all, the Internet can avoid the complexities of real life. It is enough to take into account the enthusiasm and timeliness of the information, but it's different when you meetup in life. It requires more patience and seriousness, and handles all people and things well. The so-called self-cultivation is actually to showcase the good feelings of online dating into real world.
From online dating, you will know what the other person likes and what kind of partner you hookup with. Then if you really like this person, you might as well try to make yourself a better person during this period of time before you meet. Because a lot of online dating will lead to a little bit of disappointment after they show up.
In fact, most people who like online dating are very sensitive and not very good at socializing in reality, but they are delicate and can observe the details that other people often ignore. Pay special attention to the warmth of these details. If this warmth is finally over-fulfilled, then the escalation of feelings is also natural. However, if the details are ignored or forgotten, then it is very unfortunate. The other party will not only be disappointed, but will also wipe out all the good memories you had together.
The most win-win way of online dating is to be excellent for love. That is to say, to be a better person for love. When you grow and develop for love, you are the first beneficiary, and the other party is only an indirect one. If you like each other, you can have both love and growth of yourself. But even if you can't be together in the end, you are a better version of yourself. Technically, you have nothing to lose.